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What Worked Writing an admissions essay for college Essay

Custom Student Mr. Teacher ENG 1001-04 3 May 2018

What Worked Writing an admissions essay for college

“I have the persistence of the little glob of peanut butter that sticks to the roof of your mouth. This drive has enabled me to achieve academic success.”(Gregory, pg.15) These are the words of James Gregory. These are the words he uses to tell college administrators about his character. The title of his essay is even “Chunky Peanut Butter”, it might sound like he’s not taking the admissions process seriously. Well, that’s where you\’re wrong, it’s the exact opposite. His comparison of himself to chunky peanut butter shows that he is persistent. His persistence has enabled him to achieve academic success. Because Gregory proves himself to be persistent, self-motivated, and able to bring people together in his essay, “Chunky Peanut Butter”, I contend that he is the best candidate for the online learning environment.

Gregory’s persistence shows he is the best candidate for the online learning environment known as MOOC(massive open online courses). His essay shows that he has the persistence to complete an online college course despite obstacles or adverse circumstances. “This drive has enabled me to achieve academic success, the success that I will continue into my higher education, and into my life.”(Gregory, pg. 15) His persistence which also equivalates to self-motivation will allow him to persist at higher rates because he is one of the students that will participate in online discussions and work with others that he may not know or has ever met. This trait will lead him to great success academically through an online learning environment.

Gregory’s self-motivation is one strong asset that will help him complete the MOOC because online college course tend to move fast and you usually aren’t able to “make up” assignments. Motivation is needed to meet deadlines and keep up the pace with all of the assignments. In his essay, Gregory explains how he is motivated to help people leading to his desire to become a physician. “… I enthusiastically devote time to service projects through Junior Civitans that help the community. This desire to help has been ingrained in my personality, and drives my plan to become a physician and continue my service to others.”(Gregory, pg.15) The desire to help others has motivated him to become a physician. This is the motivation that Gregory will give to complete a MOOC so he can work towards his goal of becoming a physician.

Gregory’s ability to bring people together is another strong asset that will help him tremendously in the online learning environment. Since he tends to be the “glue” or the behind the scenes person of events. This will help when the time comes to form study groups for students to come and meet one another and study. There have been attempts to gather students to form a study group however to no avail. “No one showed at the meet-up that Stacey Brown, an information technology manager at a Hartford insurance company, scheduled for a 14th-floor conference room on a Thursday after work, despite R.S.V.P’s from a few classmates in the area.”(Pappano, pg.28)This would be a task that Gregory would complete, making sure that everyone attends the study group because since he likes to describe himself as the “glue” that keeps things together or the “behind the scenes” guy. “I work behind the scenes, holding it all together, keeping all the ingredients organized and focused on the task.”(Gregory, pg. 14) His work behind the scenes could lead to him bringing everyone together.

On the other hand, some might say that Christina Mendoza and Hugh Gallagher are better candidates for the MOOC because of their independence. In Mendoza’s case, her independence in a MOOC will allow her to practice on her self-reliance because in a MOOC due to the fact that it is an online course you won’t have classmates to help you when you\’re stuck. Or any professors to help you one-on-one because not only are they teaching thousands of people online but hundreds of thousands of people in an actual college. In Gallagher’s case, his independence will allow him to pick his courses without relying on someone to choose his courses for him, courses he’s going to have to take for 4 years. This will allow him to surpass the “useless” college process. However, these are the only traits in my opinion that Mendoza and Gallagher have that will make them suitable for a MOOC. Gregory possesses all the traits that will allow him to complete a MOOC, Mendoza nor Gallagher do not. The most important thing that you must have, is the ability to self-motivate. And in Mendoza’s case, this could possibly be triggered by her childhood. During her childhood, she was made fun of because of her mixed ethnicities(being Mexican and Caucasian). In Gallagher case, he isn’t as self-motivated as he could be, this could be because he is to focus on being recognized, or receiving credit for the things he’s done. Self-motivation is needed to succeed in both a MOOC and in a traditional college. This is why James Gregory os the best suitable for the MOOC and not Gallagher or Mendoza.

Gregory’s suitability for a MOOC stems from his persistence, self-motivation, and ability to bring people together, these traits will not only allow him to qualify for a MOOC but for him to complete one. Gregory is always focused and can work through any problems or obstacles. His most important feature is his willingness to help others which is necessary for a MOOC. The qualities that James Gregory has enabled him to reach academic success and something that would help him improve and continue his academic success are, a MOOC.

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